It is a dark and rainy day here. We went and let the huge rain drops plop on our heads this morning, but now we’re ready for the rain to go away and come again another day.

I was at the grocery store last night and ran across these beauties. Huge marshmallows are totally necessary. They seem like the perfect addition to our camping gear – not that we plan on going camping anytime soon.

Since we don’t have a camping trip planned, I decided to open them up just to see how large they are. Each mallow is like triple the size of a regular one. I’m thinking that after this dang rain goes away, we’ll be outside roasting in our fire pit.

Until that point I think we’ll spend our time resting and waiting for the sun to come back again.

A precaution.

I could take that.

Kurt, the nurse from the Special Care Nursery, came to our room and introduced himself to us and explained what would be happening over the next few hours – an IV and antibiotics started for Maggie.

Barry and I walked with Kurt and Maggie across the hall to the Special Care Nursery where they hooked our little girl up to a line of antibiotics to help fight something she may or may not have. After Maggie got settled into her little corner area of the nursery I had a long conversation with her about why she was in the nursery – making it clear that in 48 hours we were going home and that she most certainly did NOT have an infection.

hospital stay (Video: click to see HB + Maggie in our little corner of the nursery. I was blog posting from Barry’s phone, go figure!)

As the 48 hours crept by Barry and I took shifts staring at our little package and got to know the nursing staff – again, I have a new perspective of what it means to be a nurse – . The nursery closes for one hour every 12 hours for the nursing shift change and we spent this time either napping or showering since staring at Maggie was not an option during the shift change.

Our families came by and took turns coming into the nursery to hold Maggie since only one person could be in the nursery at a time with either Barry or myself present. Since I looked at this time as a precautionary measure, I was able to function fairly well. The nursing staff was on the bandwagon of “Maggie’s going home in ____ hours!”

Overall the stay in the nursery was a blur and I’m fine looking back on that time with cloudy vision – I didn’t want to get too comfortable there and certainly didn’t want Maggie to either. Having a machine beep every time she moved to a strange position was not a noise I wanted to become immune to.

Long story short – because this is already a long story – the blood culture  came back negative, our baby girl is hearty, healthy and just perfect.

After an additional 48 hours in the hospital we were able to break her from the joint and take her home!!!!!

Best feeling ever.

Forceps? NO WAY!

So, there was my motivation. Within minutes (I really have no concept of how long – it could have been hours, days or seconds – all I knew is that forceps would not be used to get Maggie into this world) little Miss Maggie made her debut at 8 pounds 6 ounces!

Dr. Rogers put her on my chest and she looked around staring from me to Barry – with both of us in awe of her little body. Eventually Nurse Trish picked her up off my chest and placed her a few feet away under the heat lamp to do the Apgar test with the Nursery Nurse.

Then she was passed to Barry.

No words can describe this. Maybe the word love, but even that doesn’t seem like enough. Not even close.

Somebody passed Trish my camera and she went wild snapping shots that will never, ever see the light of day, but I’m glad we’ve got them in the HB archives. In many of the shots Barry’s smile outshines everything – such a proud, proud papa.

After nursing and having some other business taken car of Maggie’s fan club arrived. Here is a side note about our families: over the next couple days we were told by many different nurses that our families seemed really nice and fun since they had filled up the waiting room. I’m not exactly sure what went down, but I did hear that a bottle of wine was opened and the Mariner’s game was on….I would have liked to sit around with them to wait, but I was busy doing other things.

As I was saying, Maggie’s fan club arrived – they’d been waiting  for hours for her arrival and it only seemed right that they got a little face time before heading home for the rest of the early morning.

After passing the newest member of our family around people said there sleepy goodbyes and left us to stare at our daughter. OUR DAUGHTER!!!

Instead of staring Barry and Trish gave Maggie a little bath and I stayed in bed just staring out at the Lynnwood skyline thinking about the last few hours and wondered what the next few would hold.

By five o’clock Trish had all but cleaned up the room and made sure we were set before demanding that we, like snoozing Maggie, get a bit of rest. Rest wasn’t really on our minds as Barry and I huddled under our covers – me in my hospital bed and he in the fold out bed – and talked like giddy kids at a slumber party. The lights were dim and we could see Maggie’s silhouette and her lips move as she slept. Such a beautiful baby…that we made.

I’m not sure if either of us really slept a wink, but by the time daylight emerged our room was again filled with the clatter of nurses (Trish had since gone home and we were introduced to our next nurse Darlene) and doctors to check on both me and Maggie.

I had a temperature after giving birth and Maggie was unable to maintain her own steady temp, which was of concern because it meant that she could possibly be fighting an infection that she picked up from my water breaking.

The doctor ordered a blood test to take a culture to find out if indeed Maggie had an infection, but the doctor also ordered Maggie to the Special Care Nursery for 48 hours to begin treating her as if she had an infection -as a precaution.

Shocked isn’t even the best word to describe how Barry and I felt a we walked down the hall to our hospital room – the room that was meant for us to go through a life changing experience in, the room that was meant for us to greet our daughter, the room that we’d spend hours in awaiting the arrival of something that we made together.

Apparently we lucked out with the room because it was the corner suite that is typically used for twins to be born, staff members use it and people request it. It was huge and had a sweeping view of Lynnwood – lucky us! In the distance you could look and see the mountains if the cloud cover was just right.

Since my water had broken and we weren’t sure how long it had been the concern was that there was only a short amount of time to get Maggie out before the risk for infection became a concern. So, much to my chagrin, pitocin was started to get my body to start laboring again.

At this point we met our nurse, Teryl, as she came onto her shift. She was cheerful and made sure that we were comfortable. Phone calls had been made to our parents and siblings and people were on the way to the hospital. Brian, hearing that we’d been checked in, left work immediately and came to hang out with us. He came in and sat and talked with us as if it were normal for me to have contractions in between bits of nonsense conversation.

As I stood beside the bed and waited for each contraction to come Barry was next to me making me laugh and rubbing my back, feeding me ice chips to ensure that I’d get through each one. As the drugs kicked in the contractions did as well and boy, they hurt! I kept trying to describe to Barry what they felt like and each description seemed to contradict the previous one, so I stopped.

My body decided – or maybe it was the pitocin – that it didn’t want to give me a break in between contractions, which made for long contractions and short,short breaks. By this time my mom had arrived at the hospital and was in and out checking to see my progress and also going to HBHQ – where Barry’s parents were – to check in on The Syd.

After a couple hours of standing by the bed contracting, I transitioned into bed and proceeded to have the most awful contractions yet. Up until this point I’d been able to listen to Barry and focus, but suddenly the pain became unbearable and difficult to withstand. I was 5 cm dilated and the idea of breathing through the pain to get to 10 cm really didn’t sit well. Yelling, crying and trying to breathe did nothing to soothe the pain that embraced my body. Four contractions in five minutes….oh, the pain.

I decided to get an epidural.

Barry and I had talked at length about this choice over the last months and, although not ideal, after feeling a few hours of labor pains, it suddenly seemed like a fantastic option. While we waited for the anesthesiologist  the conversation was minimal, as Barry held onto my hand and coached me through the painful cramping.

The anesthesiologist  came to our room looking like he was fresh out of high school and remarked to us that we got the best room. By this time he arrived and set up shop I was more than ready to have some of the pain dissipate . I felt somewhat wimpy, but also knew that continuing on in the state that I was in wasn’t ideal for me.

Hunkering down with Barry holding my hands and the young doctor behind me – Nurse Teryl was busy re-doing my IV – I proceeded to be still long enough for the good doctor to poke a scary hole in my back. Of course the epidural didn’t kick in right away, so I continued to contract and Barry continued to feed ice chips into my mouth.

Eventually the epidural set in and I was, again, back to feeling like I was myself again, still feeling the contractions, but not in pain. Hallelujah! Around this time Barry’s parents made an appearance along with my mom, Flip was still at home mowing the lawn and would head down later in the evening. Alison Krauss and The Dixie Chicks played quietly in the background as we waited for things to speed up.

Speed up they did – Nurse Teryl had to leave and Trish became our new nurse. Trish is a large, blonde woman that is in the line of work that she is meant to be doing. She was AMAZING. All the nurses were amazing, but Trish basically delivered my baby and did a bazillion other things that I never imagined nurses would need to do.

The doctor  came and checked on me again and announced that I was 7 cm dilated, which meant that Baby Miller would soon be with us! Dr.Rogers looked at me and told me to rest up because I had a marathon coming up and she was going to go rest up and she’d see me soon.

Jump a few hours and a few more pop ins from the moms – and eventually Trish informed me that it was time to push. She also informed me that – TMI alert – having a baby is a lot like pooping a pumpkin. I have never pooped a pumpkin, so I really had no frame of reference, but in case you are wondering, I think this was a pretty good description and thought of it frequently during the next hours.

We turned up the music and started the rhythm and routine of pushing, relaxing, eating ice, pushing, relaxing, eating ice. During this time Barry was unbelievable – feeding me ice, letting me push against him in every way and encouraging me with sweet words and numbers. At one point we labored in a position that would mean that Maggie could torpedo out onto Barry’s body – after being in this position for  quite some time Barry quietly announced that his leg was falling asleep and needed to move. I wonder if his leg was really asleep or if he just didn’t feel like catching Maggie on her arrival.

Pushing, pushing, pushing for three hours and no Maggie. Ugh. Trish and Barry kept telling me that I was close – whatever that means…I just knew that I didn’t have a baby in my arms and I felt like I was pooping a pumpkin. (Sorry, but it’s true).

At one point Barry looks at me and says, “Uh, oh. Uh, oh! She’s got Flip’s bald spot!”

I was mid push and really wanted to laugh, but at the same time didn’t find it funny that my baby might have the same male pattern baldness that my father has been walking around with for decades.

With hours slipping by and we said goodbye to April 19th and hello to the dreaded 4/20, I was ready to be done pushing. My doctor arrived after Trish called her. Dr. Rogers informed us that Maggie needed to come out soon and that she might need to use extra help getting her out – and she wasn’t going to use a vacuum.

If necessary, she’d use forceps.

As my due date(s) approached I became increasingly uncomfortable being pregnant – feeling large, large, large. Although I’d stopped working the week before being at home felt nothing like a vacation. I spent my days slowly completing tasks around the house and watching my ankles swell.

Two significant things happened during that week: my doctor told me he thought I still had “a ways to go” because I still looked too comfortable. I also committed to buying an EXTRA LARGE bottle of Tums to fight off my heartburn. Up until that point I kept buying the tiny rolls thinking that my heartburn would disappear.  Hearing that my doctor seemed to think that I had time to spare made me both anxious and fairly upset – since I really wasn’t comfortable at all! I was in fact munching on Tums and trying to maintain a steady breath as I wobbled around my world.

My parents came down on Sunday, April 18th to celebrate my dad’s birthday by going to the Mariner’s game. We opted out of this experience simply because my body had started to tell me that labor was coming (TMI: loss of mucus plug) and the last two Mariner’s games we went to with Flip went into extra innings. So, I passed on sitting around Safeco waiting to see the M’s score.

Sunday night I woke to somewhat light contractions that were spaced out every twenty  minutes or so. By seven o’clock the next morning they had moved to being about 7 minutes apart. This was more of what I had imagined a typical labor experience might look like. Barry using his iPhone to track the contractions and me wandering around the house in his extra large robe breathing through them.

At one point I sent Barry to the store to pick up some pudding and cranberry juice since that was all my body wanted to eat. Thankfully, my brain has the memory of me trying to eat a pudding while a huge contraction came on and Barry ever so gently saying, “Here let me take the pudding from you.” While I was reluctant to let the pudding go I still had a perfect view of it untouched on the arm of our couch as Barry rubbed my back through the contraction.

With the end of each contraction I felt a bit of fluid leak out, but wasn’t concerned about it since I only assumed it was more of the mucus plug. We kept waiting for the contractions to get closer together or for me to be unable to breathe through them, but they did not. At about 10 o’clock I decided to call the doctor just to let them know what was going on and was immediately told to head to the Birth Center with my bags packed.

Ironically, as I hung up the phone the contractions all but stopped. Barry and I looked at each other dumbfounded and decided not to head to the hospital quite yet. After taking a nap and contemplating our decision I called the doctor’s office to let them know and they said that I needed to watch the fluid for an hour and if if didn’t ease up, head to the hospital.

So, we took the slowest walk in the entire world. We spent the walk laughing at my state because I was wearing yoga pants, a huge purple shirt, huge sunglasses and carrying my water bottle. I am sure that never had I taken so long to walk around our extended block. Looking back at that 30 minute cruise, I realize that I should have been at the hospital at this point.

Once we got back from our walk we looked at each other wondering if we should go to the hospital or not – since my contractions still were like a distant memory. We opted to grab our bags and head over to the 7th floor Birth Center. For some reason walking out of our house and leaving Sydney was really emotional and I stood there for a minute talking with our precious pup about the change that was coming. Even as I write this now, I feel a tidal wave of emotion.

“We’ve been waiting for you,” the nurse named Wendy told us as we walked through the doors of the Birth Center. She greeted us and took us to a small room to get my vitals and confirm what we thought we knew – that I had experience false labor. After strapping me into a few belts and taking some fluid sample she left us alone to wait for the results.

Barry and I stared  to each other and laughed at ourselves being typical first time parents showing up at the hospital for no reason. We made plans to go to Dairy Queen to get a blizzard and spend the rest of the afternoon hanging around HBHQ. We made plans to do anything that day other than have a baby!

After about an hour Wendy walked into our small room, smiled at us and said, “Plan on staying because your water broke!”

More to come, we are momentarily distracted by these cheeks!

B Mills Special. That’s what we call the hack jobs that I often try and pass off as handy work around HBHQ. Sometimes I like to sign my handy work for Hannah to find later. Like the time I repaired our vacuum cleaner with duct tape. She noticed the repair and accompanying signature a couple months later.

Today, I tired of climbing under my work desk to fish out cables that had fallen from their place on top of the desk. A perfect time for a B Mills Special. Viola. Not exactly pretty, but no more falling cords either. No signature necessary.

I finally found some knobs that I love to use in Maggie’s room to get away from the boring, white plastic ones that we inherited when we bought the house.

I love the new ones, they are full of color and cheer. Simple changes like this make me so happy; however, I ran into one snag.

After successfully installing one knob, the other decided to stall out halfway through the hole. Um….I’m no tool whiz, but I don’t think this is a great thing, but thankfully I’ve got a handyman named Barry that can fix things like this.

It is really starting to feel like Spring around here. Each day it seems like another burst of color appears in our backyard, some of which we planted and some of which we didn’t.

I know that my mom came and stuck a bunch of things in the ground and for that I am so grateful, the tiny buds forming just make me happy to see.

I also know that the squirrels did a bit of rearranging last year after we planted some tulips, so now we’ve got tulips coming up in random places – like the middle of our yard.

I’m just thankful that the flowers are starting to put on a show….finally!